7 baby products that shouldn’t exist

By this point I’ve been through three babies. My youngest is a toddler. So I find myself at times asking the question, “who on earth thought this baby (or toddler) product was a good idea, and why have they not made amends for their error?” Read my list, and then let me know if you agree, or if I missed any. 

Tie shoes

Why does a baby or toddler need laces? Do they know how to tie their shoes? It looks cute. Yeah. I look cute with kids screaming at me when I’m running late and it’s taking five times as long as it should to wrangle a squirmy kid into their footwear. DUMB. All baby and toddler shoes should be Velcro. 

Pajamas with snaps

If you love someone, or even mildly don’t wish them pain and suffering, DON’T give them baby pajamas with snaps. With a newborn, you’re changing their diapers several times in the middle of the night – do you really want to deal with eighty snaps at 3AM? Does it get better as they outgrow their nightly feedings? NO! What comes next is squirmy toddlerhood. Do you think they’re going to sit still and patiently wait for you to snap all 1200 snaps, realize you missed one, unsnap them all and then resnap them again? By this time they’ve pulverized your internal organs with their flailing feet and pulled your hair out by its roots. If there be any love or compassion in you at all, give zippered pajamas at the baby shower.

Bibs with Velcro

I love Target. It’s close and quick. Therefore I buy 99% of my stuff there. So I was always frustrated that ALL their bibs featured Velcro. Do you know how useless that is? The baby will wear that bib for maybe a month or two before he figures out that he can rip the hated thing off in a heartbeat. Do you think your newly-minted toddler is keeping it on? Ha! Why don’t they only make bibs with snaps or strings? Too logical, I know. 

Wipes that don’t pull apart

I’ve sampled enough wipes to know what features are important to me, and top amongst them is the ability to separate easily. When I discover that the diaper I thought housed pee is hiding poop instead, I want to be able to make that nastiness disappear ASAP before Crafty Toddler or Curious Baby starts exploring the poop with their fingers. If I gotta struggle to get my next wipe, I may not finish this thing in time. My LEAST favorite are the Target Up & Up brand wipes, while the ones I like the most are Pampers. 

Nose bulbs

Unfortunately, I did not discover the Nose Frida until my third baby. Zac was always congested, and addicted as he was to the paci, he needed to breathe through his nose. I’m telling you, even the hospital-issued nose bulbs do next to nothing. The Nose Frida, or Snot Sucker as I call it, was 5x as effective. 

Pull-ups without side Velcro

This is a no-brainer. You know how hard it is to remove a poopy pull-up that doesn’t disattach at the sides? I literally just rip the pull-up off my child. Another example of a product that must not have been made by a parent who actually uses it. Luckily, Huggies makes a pretty decent pull-up with the side Velcro. 

Musical toys without an Off button 

I think pretty much all modern toys now come with Off buttons; some are even smart enough to have two volume choices. Although this still doesn’t solve the problem of your kid activating a sound that doesn’t stop manually and then walking out of the room 😱😱😱.

You’d think after all these years someone would figure out what works and what doesn’t, but no … they leave it to us moms to sort everything out.